I know the first thing I think of when I crave sushi is the great state of Massachusetts, followed closely on the heels of a California roll that has fake lumps of crab meat in it.
So this would come as no surprise that I am currently fantasizing about eating this 422 foot California roll off, what could only be described as, a giant naked wildebeest of a woman.
The roll used 650 sheets of nori, 200 pounds of rice, 200 pounds of poser lame ass crab, and 100 pounds of the sex toy cucumber and avocado.
They not only created a travesty (albeit hilarious) by creating this mammoth concoction, but right after the roll was created, they fucking threw it away.
You read me right; they threw the damn thing away.
I have forwarded news of said event to Africa, Ethiopia, and China in hopes that a band of lion hunters, ancient Mongolians, and starving Marvin himself with come down on UMass with enough force to create a black hole around their college campus.
Creating an angry mob